Super Green Melawi (Gaiana)

[PaliGap]

[Warning: after reading this, read second post by user]

What an unusual strain this is, it's not like any other strain I've ever tried. First of all, it looks really fluorescent green and also kind of smells that way, very strong and fresh, more fresh than any i've ever smelled before (it is a new and fresh batch that's just in, after all). It's like walking in the jungle, picking a leaf, tearing it up and smelling it. Perhaps it is the freshness that is part of its distinctness.
With 5 grams my experience was as follows.
The taste is VERY strong and bitter. I have my own ways of masking the taste of Kratom completely, but this is the first time that that didn't work. The onset was strong and it was hard to pinpoint how long this took (my usual way of measuring doesn't seem to work with this strain), I would estimate it at 20 or 30 minutes. New to me was that I had to yawn a lot during the onset, almost as if I had taken a psychedelic.
Other things I noticed was feeling some warmth in my stomach and extremeties and a little heart discomfort. A striking thing was that time seemed to go faster. Painkilling properties were good, as was the energy. Not as much euphoria and moodlift as I would have wanted. I expected a Green Malay like experience, but this was different. The overtone is stimulation, I felt very alert for a long time. It's more of a neutral energy than a 'stupor-of-happiness' energy, so probably good to work, exercise or study on. My pupils were not overly constricted.
At the end I developed just a slight headache and felt a bit 'crashy'. All of this leads me to believe that this strain has a lot of affinity to the dopamine and also κ-opioid receptors (and maybe some to the adrenergic and perhaps even serotonergic receptors) and not so much to the μ-opioid receptor.

Analgesia 1/5
Energy 1/5
Sedation 1/5
Relaxation 1/5
Euphoria 1/5
Moodlift 1/5
Bodyload 1/5
Headactivity 1/5
Allroundness 1/5
Strength 1/5
Duration 1/5
Overall 1/5

[Chinaski]

Hm.. that sounds a bit dodgy to my ears. Yawning, discomforts, headaches, crash, fluorescent, taste... It better not be sprayed with pesticides or something! Be careful.

[PaliGap]

You know, I still had it sitting in my cupboard after that 1 trial. After reading your post yesterday I thought, what the hell, maybe it matured over the past 6 months, so I took 6 grams. The taste was still very strong and bitter, but not as pungent as the first time. But this is what happened:
T+0.5: Stomach discomfort. Pain, even. Decorated further with a firm hint of nausea and dysphoria.
T+1.5: Took some activated charcoal, because feeling pretty sick.
T+2.0: Alas, the charcoal was a little too late. I had a severe diarrhea attack.
After that I took a painkiller to fight the dysphoria and help with some added constipation.

So a warning might be in place (although this product has been taken off the vendor's site a while ago, probably no coincidence): this shit is POISON. I don't know if it's pesticides (I fucking hope not) or if the stuff's even Mitragyna Speciosa. I've never had such an experience in a decade of Kratom use. I don't totally want to bash this vendor, because his Maeng Da's were pretty solid, but I mean come on.

Oh, and Chinaski: can you change my ratings for, well everything for this strain, to 1/5? Thanks.

[PaliGap]

Follow-up:
I have contacted the vendor in the mean time and he had received more complaints about this specific batch of this specific strain (October 2014). After analysis it turned out that the leaf was mixed with another leaf with high 9,12,15-Octadecatrienoic Acid and Squalene amounts in it. According to the vendor natural and not harmful compounds. So no pesticides. I deffo hope it was harmless, because I felt pretty sick, but I'm gonna go with the explanation given. The vendor said he cut off all ties with the specific supplier.
I also got compensated with some other plain leaf of the same weight as the original order. Included was a generous bonus of some Maeng Da 30:1 extract. So case closed for me. The newly received Kratom is good. I hope this is some sort of lesson for all vendors out there to never let their guard slip on quality control.